IS IT JUST ME?

… or have you ever lied about having seen a film?

The boys and girls over at /Film recently posted a list of the FILMS PEOPLE PRETEND TO HAVE SEEN. If you’re wondering, Godfather tops the list but you can see the full Top 10 by CLICKING HERE!!!

Now, I must admit that I have been guilty of this in the past. Not so much to save face or seem cooler or maintain my movie watching street cred. More because I want to avoid a rundown of the film (because I can typically tell you the broad strokes of most films I haven’t seen regardless) or the inevitable “You haven’t seen (blank)? How can you call yourself a movie fan when you haven’t even seen (blank)?” AKA: The most annoying film conversation ever.

The fact is that, being a movie fan, I have seen waaaaaaaay more films than most people. However, the shear number of films being released every year, the number of films in existence and their availability or appeal make it difficult. Nay, it is down right impossible to see EVERYTHING. And I’ll be damned if I’m going to receive a diatribe from someone for not having seen a forgettable action film from the late 80’s or Charlie Chaplin’s entire catalogue or the works of Tyler Perry. Particularly based on the amount  of films I see on a weekly basis (which is impressive) and especially not from someone who usually has yet to see The King’s Speech or The Dark Knight or some other much more popular, mainstream and easily attainable film.

What I’m getting at is this… while in the last few years I have really dialed it back, there have been times when I’ve said things like “Sure, I’ve seen It’s a Wonderful Life. Great film!” Even though I haven’t and just to avoid the Bullshit. But what I’m wondering is have you ever lied about seeing a film? Which ones and why?

Or is it just me?

HOT OR NOT?

Recently, I’ve come to realize that there is a plethora of female celebrities out there that I think are attractive but cannot, for the life of me, decide whether or not I think they’re hot. So, I’m presenting the argument to you. Hear me out and then tell me what you think.

MALIN AKERMAN.

Pros: Was a model. Sexy Body. Might still own her Silk Spectre costume from Watchmen.
Cons: She has a really big face. Kind of like a fat girl’s face on a skinny actress’ body.

SIGOURNEY WEAVER.

Pros: See Galaxy Quest!
Cons: Has a chin only rivalled by the likes of Jay Leno.

THE OLSEN TWINS.

Pros: Skinny, cute, rich, sexy lips.
Cons: Limbs like tether ball poles. Kind of feels rapey since they were the kids from Full House!

FAMKE JANSEN.

Pros: Tall, slim, exotic and sexy.
Cons: May have been born a man. Seriously, watch Rounders again and tell me you don’t get a Tranny vibe!

RENE RUSSO.

Pros: ????? (I’m stumped)
Cons: ????? (Literally stumped!)

So, what do you think? HOT or NOT?

TOP 5 MOVIES: WESLEY SNIPES

You know the deal, folks! Anyone can give you a Top 5 Brad Pitt or George Clooney list. We here at THE LIST prefer to shine a light on the little guys.

Now some of you are probably saying, “Hey! Snipes was a huge star.” True, he WAS. However, in the last decade or so he has gone from being one of the most sought after black actors in Hollywood to filming straight-to-DVD films and infomercials for work out equipment with Chuck Norris. And just when you thought it couldn’t get any worse, Snipes landed himself in prison for tax evasion. Still, the boy had skills. So, I say we honor his accomplishments by looking at some of his finer films:

HONORABLE MENTION: MURDER AT 1600.

While this film is a bit of a cookie-cutter procedural detective story, I’ve always just kind of really liked it. Plus, anytime bad things happen at the White House in a film, it just makes them more interesting!

5. DEMOLITION MAN.

Stallone has made a lot of action films but Demolition Man is probably one of my favorites. I think it’s because of how well they blend comedy into the film. I mean, the seashell thing alone is hilarious. Snipes helps make this film a classic with his awesome turn as bad guy Simon Phoenix.

THE LIST NEEDS A LAMMY

WE ARE BACK! That’s right, vacation was fun but all good things must come to an end. We are back with all new content for you, our dear readers, and none too soon. You see it’s LAMMY time again and we need your help.

As you can see in the sidebar, we are a proud member of THE LARGE ASSOCIATION OF MOVIE BLOGS (aka: THE LAMB). Every year, THE LAMB holds their annual LAMMY awards. A chance to recognize the best of the best… Karate Kid style! Last year, after being a member for a short time, we received several votes but were unable to get a nomination. Well, a year has passed, as have 100,000 hits, and this year we want to take the farm animal home. Sadly, it’s not the first time I’ve said that in my life!

So, if you are a member of LAMB, as I know many of our readers our, please remember to vote for THE LIST and MILFcast when casting your votes this year!

THE LIST IS ON VACATION

In the immortal words of Peter Cetera, “Everybody needs a little time away.” Personally, I don’t have much of a choice. It’s family vacation time and I’m off to spend a little time drinking alcohol poolside. Regular posts will resume again on Monday, April 25th. Until then, enjoy this pic of super hottie Kelly Brook getting her nerd on:

Cheers, y’all!

MILFcast (aka: the Man, I Love Films podcast) – Episode 21

For the 21st Episode of MILFcast, I am joined by resident hotty Heather Roddy (of Movie Mobsters) and our guests Rachel Thuro and Jessica Rogers (of the Reel Insight podcast) to discuss the following:

– What we’ve been watching.

– Heather explains her Facebook updates… sort of!

– We rank our Top 3 Favorite Title Sequences.

– We play a game of Heather’s Always Right and THE GAME!!!

You can find MILFcast on podOmatic by clicking here. You can also subscribe or download for free on iTunes. Please drop a comment or leave any feedback on the episode below or send me an e-mail at: kai_parker@yahoo.com

Here are the standings for THE GAME thus far (21 = Perfect Score):
T-1. Angie Carrillo – 18 points
T-1. Jon Sullivan – 18 points
2. Jim Napier – 16 points
T-3. Pablo Pappano – 15 points
T-3. Steve Bush – 15 points
T-3. Frank Mangarelli – 15 points
4. Scott Knopf – 14 points
T-5. Ryan Helms – 13 points
T-5. Dylan Fields – 13 points
6. Aiden Redmond – 11 points
7. Marc Ciafardini – 10 points
8. Jon Silver – 6 points

Music for the podcast provided by Steve Bush of The Bill Shakespeares who can be found at http://thebillshakespeares.com

TOP 5 TV-to-FILM ADAPTATIONS

 

This one’s pretty self-explanatory. Let’s say we jump right in:

5. JACKASS.

I suppose this is a bit of a cheat since the movie is really just one long episode of the show but isn’t that what all adaptations are. I can’t help loving these movies. They crack me up.

TOP 5 MOVIES: VAL KILMER

 

Looking at Val Kilmer, for me, is like looking into a mirror. In that, we’ve both ballooned to twice the size we were 10 years ago! I have to admit that this list is a bit of a cheat. I tend to try to focus on smaller stars when making these lists. Mainly because you can get a Top 5 Brad Pitt list anywhere. And Kilmer was arguably a huge star with some great films under his belt. However, in recent years, he has joined the likes of Wesley Snipes and Steven Seagal with a slew of straight to DVD films. I thought we should take a look back at a great career and liked the challenge of narrowing it down to only 5. So, here they are:

HONORABLE MENTION: BATMAN FOREVER.

I felt like mentioning this film because a lot of people forget that it actually wasn’t that bad of a film. Better known as the non-Burton, non-nipple bat-suit film, Kilmer actually delivers a solid turn in this film and delivers one hell of a Bruce Wayne.

5. TOMBSTONE.

Some people like Wyatt Earp and some people like Tombstone. Personally, I’m a Tombstone man myself. The main reason for this is Val Kilmer who kills it as the infamous Doc Holliday. He’s so good, he could be my Huckleberry!

MY TOP 5 STONER FLICKS

Let’s be clear about one thing… while I enjoy the occasional (Okay, frequent!) alcoholic beverage, I haven’t done any drug of any kind in many a moon. It did happen though. In case I decide to run for public office some day, I should state for the record: I didn’t exhale… for a long time… and it was more of a huge cough than an exhale. Now that that’s clear, here’s my Top 5 Stoner Flicks that make me reminiscent of the days spent with my Buds:

5. HAROLD & KUMAR GO TO WHITE CASTLE.

This film answers the ancient stoner question: How good does White Castle sound right now? This film is chock-full of laughs and features one of my favorite cameos. That being Neal Patrick Harris as a drugged out, womanizing, thief with an ego. Did I mention he plays himself?

TOP 5 MOVIES: DELROY LINDO

You know the drill by now, folks. You can go anywhere to find a Top 5 list for the likes of Brad Pitt and George Clooney. We here at THE LIST like to focus on the other guys. Today’s list is dedicated to my MILFcast co-host (Heather Roddy) who has an unhealthy obsession with Delroy Lindo. Apparently, at some point, he ate her cookies. While that isn’t a sexual innuendo, I don’t think it’s meant to be taken literally either. Quite honestly, I have no idea what it means. What I do know is that these are his Top 5 films:

HONORABLE MENTION: GET SHORTY.

You can’t make a Delroy Lindo list and not mention Get Shorty (the film for which he is likely most often associated with). I recognize that the film is pretty darn good but, unfortunately, I’ve never really been a fan so the best I can do here is mention it. A for effort!

5. THE CORE.

NO GET SHORTY BUT THE CORE IS ON YOUR LIST? Yup! I’m not going to pretend that The Core is a good movie but I’m also not going to pretend that I don’t watch it every time it comes on TV. There’s something to be said for that. I love a good disaster movie and this Armageddon (to the center of the Earth) rip-off is solid cheesy disaster fun!