THE REASONS MOVIES RULE: ROAD HOUSE 2

It’s time for a new entry into our REASONS MOVIES RULE series. Wherein we give you 10 reasons a film, be it awesomely good or so bad it’s awesomely good, deserves to be given some respect. This week’s entry is ROAD HOUSE 2: LAST CALL.

It started with the father now it’s time for the son. So, without further messing about, I present you with 10 REASONS ROAD HOUSE 2 RULES!

1. YUP! IT’S DALTON’S KID.

So, Dalton is dead (like I believe that’s possible), and his son, DEA Agent Shane Tanner continues to be on the look for his father’s killer. I’m in!

2. QUOTES.

A few classics from the original are called back. Such as the classic, “I thought you’d be taller.” But to give you an idea of how awesome this film is, here are the only 2 quotes listed on IMDB:

Chubby D’Acosta: You know why they call me The Robot? Because I’m so automatic at kickin’ your ass.

Nate Tanner: [Beau is in the house looking around. Nate comes up behind her and taps her on the shoulder] Hello
Beau: Hey
[She turns around and kicks nate in the Groin]
Beau: Oh my god. Are you ok?
Nate Tanner: No!

Those last lines, which are listed under “memorable quotes” on IMDB, are also spoken by Shane Tanner, not Nate Tanner.

3. CAT FIGHT.

The blonde in this fight is actually the town’s grade school teacher.

Which leads to my next point…

4. EVERYONE KNOWS KARATE.

You got a punch or kick to throw? Don’t do it in this town! Cuz everybody, and I mean EVERYBODY, knows the countermove and will follow that with a karate chop to your giblets.

5. THE TWINS.

So, these big booby darlings are featured prominently on the cover of the DVD with the star of the film. To give you an idea of how awesomely bad this film is, their whole part in the film was them getting out of a car and walking into the bar, over the opening credits, as a camera went up their bodies from head to toe.

6. JONATHAN SCHAECH.

Just wouldn’t be my site if I didn’t grab the most homo-erotic shot available on the internet.

Sure, we all liked Schaech in That Thing You Do and hated him when he married and divorced our biggest crush of the 80’s: Christina Applegate. Still, you gotta love his devotion to this project… he also co-wrote the film.

7. JAKE BUSEY.

I think we can all agree that any film with a Busey in it is a better one. This is his best work since Starship Troopers! No… seriously!

8. WILL PATTON.

I don’t know if you know Will Patton but, from Armaggedon to this to The Punisher, he just has a way of classing up cheesy films.

FOR THE LAST 2, I wanted to point out just a couple reasons why this film doesn’t live up to the original. Bit of a bummer but the film is so awesomely bad that I will forgive these. Here they are:

9. THE BLACK PELICAN.

You follow up the classic Double Deuce with The Black Pelican? Was there no “What should we call the bar” meetings? Cuz I know there was no character development meetings!

10. NO MULLETS.

Seriously… couldn’t they just have thrown one in there for old time’s sake?

12 Responses to “THE REASONS MOVIES RULE: ROAD HOUSE 2”

  1. Hmmmm, something tells me I’m never gonna get around to this, but that groin kicking scene does sound awfully amusing.

  2. Hahahahaahahahahahaha………….

    I never even knew there was sequel. It looks horrible, but I see why you love it. Even if it IS lacking PS and Mullets, there is karate and hot blond twins. Those are acceptable reparations in my book.

    The Black Pelican………….teeheee

    And right, I just don’t believe that someone killed Dalton unless it was Aragorn.

  3. AHaha love it when you do post like this 🙂 Love that pic where dude is about to give a kung-fu type punch with his hand as a claw instead of a fist!

  4. Poor Jon Schaech – he was supposed to be the Next Big Thing once upon a time. I guess Roadhouse 2 will have to do.

    Never knew the Buse (Jr.) was in this! Sweet! Though his best role will always be the one in Contact. Those creepy stares are the best, Jerry!

    I didn’t see a mention of an actual nudity – does it deliver?

    I gotta see this eventually…

    • Yes, poor Schaech… I have a feeling he might be his own worse enemy… and that he gets 5 o’clock shadow right after he shaves.
      Contact is great… forgot that was him.
      There is some nudity… the “Buse (Jr.)” has a 3some in a hottub but it wasn’t as good as I had hoped… or as it coulda been!

  5. Will Patton… great in Remember The Titans

  6. I’m watching this movie right now, and trying desperately to find out who those twins were! Does anybody have any idea?

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